Baar baar dekho...

After I had seen the promos I wanted to see this piece though reviews weren't motivating enough to go ahead but still I heard of my heart and went ahead. And once again my heart didn't let me to disappointment. It wasn't bad at all! No offense towards the critics. May be what I perceived was what they couldn't.
Basically it's story of couple in love since childhood. There comes a stage when they fall into deciding to get tie the knots. Our man here, Siddharth Malhotra, gets nervous just like any other person in such a situation would. He isn't sure if he should choose his marriage over his better career opportunity. Since the inception of time human beings are designed certain way. Men were assigned the duty to be the earners for the family whilst women became designers of nurturing the family and children. In the modern era decided to shift certain rules. Women empowerment lead to making them more powerful and achieve everything else that a man could do. Not forgetting that their essential character still is imbibed in them and despite being able-to-achieve-everything still she cannot compromise on with not talking care of her children and man. Similarly, a man always thinks of achieving great things in life for that is their essential character, to earn for his family. Very rarely though few might have broadened their horizon till date and thought of changing nappies along.
Siddharth, feels insecure about his career looking at the influence his would be father-in-law had over her daughter and her life. No one has the right to rule others life. He tries to run away from the situation that was suffocating his rather than it should have made him happy for starting a new phase. Suddenly next morning he wakes up being on his honeymoon beside his wife, of which he was not sure tying knots with. He panics for he didn't remembered when did they get married! Katrina did manages well Siddhartha's weird behaviour about he not remembering their marriage. Siddharth decided to enjoy the moment for he did love her.
Next morning Siddharth wakes up two years in the future where Kat was throwing pillows on him, they were in UK where he had got his job as a Mathematician at Harvard university(if I'm not wrong!😅) Kat was having labor pain while Siddharth want able to figure out what the heck was going on... How could his life move so great ahead. But he didn't had time to analyze anything as his baby was about to born. They drive to the hospital. Seeing his baby and taking him in his arms he learns being a father is a valuable attribute. He tries to settle with this feeling for the day that he was a father of a baby boy!
Next day comes and he wakes up 10 years ahead. He was father of two children. He goes to the university where he dreamt of teaching. He gets promotion. In all his work and professional life he find it difficult to find time for his wife and children. They're not happy with him.
Next day he wakes up being 42! His son who was in teenage now drives him the court. Clueless he goes in and then he gets divorced. His world seem collapsed. His children doesn't love him, his wife was not happy with him in the marriage for he never had participated in any family moments.
Siddharth cries, begs to God for one chance to change his life. He couldn't imagine his life without his family.
In next phase he wakes up to the day where he finds his children and wife around him but that was the day when his mother was no more. He regret that he couldn't tell his mother how much he loved her. Then he realises that Katrina was no longer his wife but he married someone who supported her dreams and was also with children when needed. He knew he had failed. He was successful and had a profession he always dreamt of having but no one around him to love him.
He learned that it's essential to BALANCE life. Happiness is living in small moments rather than in big achievements. If it's duty to work then it's also a man's responsibility to ensure that his wife and children are getting enough of emotional support from him.

I loved the lesson that this movie had also the way it was shown was also different.
Baar baar bhale hi matt dekho but it's worth watching once. 😉

They were strangers...

They were strangers.
He felt something for her which was strange and unique.
He grabbed every opportunity to be around her, listen to her, talk to her, topic didn't mattered.
He trusted her and made her laugh.
She developed soft corner for him.
She trusted him the most.
They talked day and night, about everything.
They worked together, laughed together, played together.
Physical distance came between them.
They talked but he got busy in work.
They shared but he cared less.
She complained but he had nothing to say.
They missed but it became a habit.
They lived but now apart.
She wanted him as before but that was lost long.
She tried to remind but he forgot.
She cried out while he doze off.
She tried to show but he couldn't see the difference.
He ignored, She roared.
He slept as tired, she stood awake as tired.
She wanted to talk, he said I've my own life too.
He went ahead, she dragged behind.
He let go, she held hard.
He hurt, she hurt.
He went, she left.
They were strangers again...

Marriage celebration cum school reunion

Saturday morning, 27th Feb, 2016, on the wheels were Prati, Sara, Kanchi, Nutu and me... As we left behind our respective houses, slowly after years it was when we all were together. Heading towards the event of one of our school days friend Suppu's wedding. We all seated comfortable in Prati's Amaze which actually amazed us while she drove. It was so much fun to be together after so many years. Everyone was busy in their lives and different career that they chose post our SSC. Though few of us were in touch but not all. Ideally we should be talking about our lives or at least about the old days but... .... they were yawning. Indeed Saturday weekend is meant to be relaxing while we forced ourselves to get up on usual time of weekdays and get ready. Not that getting ready was a matter of complaint, it could never be for girls 😜 but getting otta bed was surely a pain. The other peer pressure to keep us silent was TO-SAVE-MAKEUP-TILL-THE-LAST-CLICK... yeah we took pains to get ready, look hot and gorgeous in our own ways and the mission was to get the best shot at the reception. There were hours left and we didn't wanted to ruin our morning efforts of hours that we took sacrificing our precious sleep. But girls can never be completely quite as well no matter even if their makeup is at high stake... 😅 The mouth opener was outdated songs that were being played by Prati. Agreed that she gave us a ride but that doesn't mean to give us headache with those songs from 80's or 90's. We made faces and comments came from everyone on each song being played... Fun was getting started. The fact that we were all together was the good reason for us to know that we all were back to the memories of our childhood. While I took different selfie of everyone from the front, Nutu was damn busy with her phone, checking out her makeup, Sara, despite threatening her that her makeup will be ruined doze off, Kancu is a silent one. So me and Prati were only left with chatting. We are school days best buddies. I was more of observing how she was driving. IT WAS FREAKING AWESOME MAN! I said myself. I was completely mesmerised and went to the day dream of myself driving a car and taking my parents and friend out with me.
Well, secondary if they would risk their lives to fulfill my dream. 😂 I do feel it's a great task to drive, that too a four wheeler it's much big task, to manage accelerator, gear, steering, everything along with being present minded on road as well as inside with the passengers, but on the other hand I feel it's what do many people could do so it'll not be that difficult too.😉🙆

As we reached, getting out of car was as if someone put us to furnace, it was HOT. We climbed upstairs and reached the hall. All our eyes wanted to see was our friend Suppu in the bridal look. There was time for it, we were thirsty and there came tray of soft drink and two of us picked the orange ones while others were black. Other girls too wanted orange one, they waited... Came the next guy with only one orange filled glass... Again few waited. Finally next time he brought all orange glasses... Hehehe.... Yeah we love orange one, all of us. We slowly started our philosophies about marriage, the theme effect probably. Few said they hate it, few said they will wait for it, few happy about it while few with no thought about it. We all had our own perception about it. Though we all agreed... EK DIN KARNI PADEGI-NO MATTER WHAT! 😂 This is India after all.
Our bride came and like every bride, she was looking the most beautiful. It was her day indeed. She was the heroine of the event. The traditional Maharashtrian wedding started. We had other three Maharashtrian buddies in the group. Sitting next to Prati, I was asking her about the meaning of the ceremony, though less knowledge we have about the ceremony but I was excited about the whole event. I love to see the marriage  ritual being performed. I just get divine feeling. As it's said, "MARRIAGES ARE MADE IN HEAVEN BUT PERFORMED ON EARTH." So was this ceremony taking place on earth in front of us. The wishes came straight from the heart while witnessing the wedding for our friend,"Love is wonderful to be fallen in,
But more pleasurable is the journey to live that love within...
The divinity of a marriage have thrived from heaven to earth,
May your life blossom in this relationship ahead in this path..."
We all showered the colourful rice slowly on the couple on it being said, "SHUBH MANGAL SAVADHAN" by the Pandit. It felt funny and cute to do like that. I've seen and heard about it on TV before.
After the ceremony of SAATH PHERE the bride and groom went to get ready for the reception. In between for those who got bored and were yawning we clicked lots of selfie and Nutu clicked best pics of our newly married couple. They not only looked beautiful but were very notorious and looked very happy together.
Our stomachs were roaring for the food. Meanwhile stepping towards it we met one of our school teacher. She was very happy to see us all grown up from little girls to young ladies. Indeed she don't recognise us but it's not expected either. Faces are always remembered though names might get forgotten.
We ate our stomach full. The food was delicious. Sara and I had more of our focus on the desert, being it's fan. It was Strawberry Basundi, a new experience.   YUMMMMMMM....
We stepped back to the reception, alive for the click on the stage. There was long que which we all hate but couldn't help. Doing masti together diverted our focus and we reached the couples quicker than we thought. We congratulated the couples. Our friend who looked gorgeous from far shocked us from near view. MAKEUP over and above required was put up. This became the gossip amongst us as we drove back...
We fought for the next song to be played, we cheered up for even the saddest songs.
Most exciting number was, "CHADHI MUJHE YAARI TERI AISI JAISE DARU DESI... We shouted the lyrics in sync as it was what we felt. Even before this trip ends we had more plans being made. Our dream being making road trip to GOGOGOGOGOAAAAAAAA...
Without much ado everyone dragged me for movie NEERJA. I wanted to see it but I had told home will be back at evening which got into late evening as movie ended around 8pm! I didn't wanted to see this movie on that day, because we had such blasting day and watching a serious movie like this will shift the mood from north pole to south I knew. But we wanted to see a movie together and it was it. We were all in shock as it ended. I MISSED MY MUM so much during whole movie. I wanted to hug her tightly. I LOVE HER THE MOST... MMMMUUUAAAHHHH MOM 😘

We hugged  each other bye and the day became one of the most memorable one to be recorded in here on my blog.😊

Of love...

Your whole life you try to find someone who can love you immensely and who can be with you through all roughs and smooths. You turn whole your world upside down and love so much that you loose yourself in this process, in making each other ONE!
But in this whole process you completely forget yourself...
The worst is not losing someone you love but it's losing yourself in the process of loving someone...
Until you find love and self respect in  yourself for you, you won't be able to find true love. And when you realise your own love in your heart there won't come any need to find something outside when you have it in ample for yourself.

Most difficult thing is not to love someone forever but to love yourself the most than anyone can ever to you or you to someone!

This Valentine be special for yourself!😊

Silence speaks in loudly...

It always felt necessary to give detailed explanation for any acts done for anything intended to do. Just for sake of avoiding any misunderstanding and misconceptions. To have clear understanding everything was said and explained clearly. That's needed it felt. Also similar acts were EXPECTED in return.

Afterwards now...

Nothing is said, directly done...
Nothing is explained, everything is understood... Even if not understood there is no more fear of any happening of misunderstanding!
No expostulations are asked for nor given any!
Not all feelings are expressed but supposed to remain in for now it's understood well that FEW FEELINGS ARE WELL EXPLAINED THROUGH SILENCE...

SILENCE IS POWERFUL... MOST POWERFUL THAN WORDS COULD SPEAK!

Friendship Day! ;-)

Had a lovely day today on friendship day by meeting all me BFFs.
Sometimes life feels so blessed despite all ODDs all because I'm surely blessed to have lovely people in my life. They help me, inspire me, be with me as pillar and never let me fall, be with me at all times, even if I forget to contact without any ego make efforts to be in touch.
So many things I've learned from them and learning more...
I am sure they too feel same for me hence I am part of their life. :-)
Thank you GOD for all the friends you've given me. They are one of best people in the world! :-) 

Shiva Triology 1- The Immortals of Meluha

I have been fascinated about this book series by the praise I heard for this author and his work. After making right time to start with this book, also because of my pure interest in SPIRITUALITY, I haven't tried before reading any spiritual book but had followed the story of LORD SHIVA for the matter of fact of being Hindu by religion or otherwise the worship done in family but yes indeed, I had some interest in reading the book only for the matter of fact it being based on story of Lord Shiva and yet it offering something new and different was the another obvious reason to go for it!
Mind you! Taking the same story line and  trying to write it differently without deviating from it's real essence as well as fulfilling the essence on the main sculpture isn't totally an easy task which the author Amish had fulfilled to the greater extent if not completely.
Having known the story of Lord Shiva and reading something same in order to find something new was into itself a too high as a hope from deep inside of my tiny heart and yet the book had not disappointed me so much so that as soon as I finished with the first series I fetch the following one from the same series rather than taking a break and continuing with something else to refresh my mind.
The story, as already described is written based on the Modern lifestyle in the same spiritual sense, this is something that this man 'AMISH' did to break the ice. Well, to admit it or to confess, I have never been a person to love reading HISTORY, GEOGRAPHY, WAR or TRAVEL type of books. And this book has almost all of these things and I held it high in my hands reading it over long late nights, wishing day not to end like this, getting scoldings from Parents for indulging too much into a book, hiding myself and pretending to be asleep sometimes to rescue from the taunts, I read the book that was very aptly descriptive neither too heavy nor too shallow. The imaginary descriptions awesomely transfuse to distill historic spiritual essence to transform the wholesomeness of actual momentary situations into the actuality of real world making them appear in front of your eyes as you read them. May it be the war, the wit, friendliness, faith or the dance of the Neelkanth it all transforms as real in the description without stretching it beyond reasons.
The story has newness yet wasn't vague. The historic heroes and other characters were very well defined, characterized, played into the plot that was not ditto to what any of us would have heard or seen as a story of Lord Shiva. Having seen the series of show Devon ke Dev Mahadev on Life OK channel I am well acquainted with the whole story. Yet Shiva and Sati of this new modern story are different yet similarly spiritual and soulful.
The part that touched me deeply-Ram rajya and the policies framed by Lord Rama. Having seen the caste system prevailing in INDIA since decades and surely going to go on for don't-know-how-long, what Amish wrote was such a perfect policy for the perfect empire like Meluhans'. I wished if the Karma of human being actually decided the fate of profession they would be in then many wouldn't have suffered in the past nor would have they been suffered this way in present and not in mere future. But well..  that's the PERFECT scenario... Still, it felt good to know the perfect scenario!
The Vikarma system-untouchable it's was and is indeed very strange one, the logic, the following of same in the society, it's difficult to curb it. Only Neelkanth could erase it but not from real India.
The fiction that Amish added, it's perfection make me feel whether the real GOD forgot to imbibe those principles in lives of humanity before their extinction for the real India still suffers from so much from it's vague beliefs that humanity is still in danger. Well, may be only God knows, whether he forgot or we forgot...
The death of Brihaspati was indeed shocking and sad. The friendship shown between Shiva and him was affectionately sweet and lovely. A friend anyone would want to have.
The faith of people of Meluhans' in the Neelkanth led normal man Shiva drive ahead and lead the humanity to free them from the EVIL. Shiva's past-the nightmare he get was the transformation of a child into man and yet the guilt remained forever which was also an essential for him to lead his destiny to save Meluhans'.
Sati, strong yet delicate, cultural yet revolting, loving yet opposing, supportive yet a thinker, daughter of King yet accepted the title of Vikarma. One of the wonderful character Amish has plot with the suspense of she being the Vikarma, her culture, her sacrifices, her dignity, her love, her support, everything about SATI was a learning for me as a woman, as an Indian woman.
Love of Shiva & Sati has always touched me deeply as a person who believes in soulmates. The attempt to sacrifice her life for Shiva by Sati and then Shiva's immense faith in saving Sati's life even though everyone gave up all hope was really touching phase.
The first part ends with the suspense whether the Nagas are the real evil if not the Chandravanshi?

P.S.: One thing I felt that could have been better is the cover of the book. Since Amish has depicted the importance of THE NEELKANTH so much in the book, the faith of people in people him by mere his name. I wish the cover pic would have been that of The Neelkanth than this one! (Just a thought being a complete reader whom title as well as cover too matters along with the story! ;-))
Well, I am not giving any sort of recommendations whether you should read this book or not but with the given summary of the same you felt like you can feed your brain with something from this one then go for it, for everyone has different taste and preferences in reading. You may sometimes experiment with your taste though, who knows you might like it? ;-)

Happy Reading! :-)

Forgiveness...

A scene on a daily soap, HIT ME HARD deep inside...  Couldn't stop from sharing it at this place which is so much MINE... ☺

THE HUSBAND returns after years ever since he got frustrated and left his WIFE & a very young daughter of 2-3 year old who were not only dependent on him for finances but also for LOVE and expected a normal life. After he returns the wife goes into the flashback and remembers how she BEGGED to him to not leave them alone.

So strange i felt after watching the scene... 
A PERSON decides to leave everything because he is frustrated of everything and everyone around. He wanted to get rid of EVERYONE and be alone. BUT when he was alone he understood what he had lost!
Well this theory is altogether different but what KNOCKED me was, HE RETURNED BACK, he returned to home, to parents, to wife, to child, to normal life. He returned to a second chance... BUT....  But do he deserve it? This is what strike me... 
Two thoughts...
First, NO, he should be abandoned. He left coz he thought he had choice whether he wanted to give love and affection that was his first duty towards his family. So now his family should also get equal right to choose, him or no more of him.
Second, YES, he returned coz he LEARNT life isn't about leaving the battle field and running away but about fighting the battle together with the help of loved ones. He learned the LESSON.

Second one mature understanding but equally difficult to implement. First one a general perception or line of action. It's always easy to follow general perception BUT it's not a cake walk to do second one.
Funny fact is, IT'S MUCH MORE EASIER TO HAVE A THIRD PERSON VIEW, like am doing right now, AND CONCLUDE ON WHAT COULD BE DONE OR WHAT SHOULD BE DONE BUT ACTUAL FACT IS ONE WHO BEARS ONLY KNOWS WHAT TO BE DONE...

Well one thing is foresure LIFE ISN'T THAT EASY... 😂

Commitment

Sometimes, when I look at few couples who seems weird in their personalities and from outer perspective they look incompatible, well you may think I'm being judgemental about them but being an observer indeed you do judge, but when you look at their years of relationship with each other the saying looks to have been proved true, true love lies in souls.
I guess what it takes for a long lasting, happy and successful relationship is not COMPATIBILITY but ACCEPTABILITY.
We all agree that No one is perfect. But when we come to choosing or life partner we do end up expecting him/her to be perfect for us. We look at compatibility rather then the acceptance level.
Generally if you'll see, we have so many relations that we share in our day to day life. We have firstly our Parents then our siblings then cousins, other relatives and friends. Out of all only our friends are the one whom we choose. But those who are with us from always and will be with us forever are our family members and you know the strangest fact? We get our family by birth. We don't get choice. From starting we know he is my dad, she is my mom, he&/she is Bro&/Sis and so on. We never judge them. I've never heard anyone saying, I wish he was my father instead of my dad or she was my mother or so...  But when it comes to spouse, at least in today's generation it is like, so DAMN strange when I hear relationships break coz people are not happy with each other and end up with divorce and then remarriage. I'm not against divorce or remarriage but it's like when you feel like you have an option with you, people are tend to exercise the same i guess. Whereas, a true relationship is accepting others flaws and loving the person more for his/her qualities than trying to throw them out of your life and look for those qualities in someone else and then get involved with them.
Likewise I guess everyone should end up marrying every other person, because we all are unique and everyone has flaws not to forget.

Uff, these social life issues, they're not at all easy to handle... 🙆

31st wedding anniversary of my Parents

Today Mom and Dad completed 31 years of marital experience with each other.
💑👫
Awesome isn't it? 😃
Indian wedding are mostly arranged by their families. In previous generation they use to meet their mates only after marriage. So strange, now at least people get choice to decide and yet they seems to be having difficulty in keeping up with their relationship.
May be people were more patient then and now more rightful. Now no one wish to do any compromise for the whole life. But isn't TRUE LOVE all about SACRIFICE too?
Well, I can write for hours on this topic I guess but would like to over flow my thoughts some other day. 😉😁

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY MOM DAD! 😊😘
LOVE YOU BOTH a lot. 😍💝

Living to live more...

Sometimes you just love to be on your own... No known person around you to talk to but your voice which you listen to. Just your heartbeat, your brain, your body and soul that you think about and also about others but not listening to someone or talking to someone but to yourself. You and your thoughts and the cool breeze coming from window of the train at night. Everything out of window seems running back but the true fact is you are moving ahead towards your destination.
At that moment you don't even wish to listen to songs but sing your own song, from deep inside your heart.
Analysing your life, analysing yourself, your character, your values, your true self, your day, your surrounding, your wishes, your dreams, your desires, your accomplishments, your life's sweet memories. Collecting all positive thoughts and memories and making bunch of it and tying it tight and keeping it in the centre of your heart and mind that gives you peace, self satisfaction, pride, happiness now and you save that bunch of happiness for future and keep adding to it more of the happiness.

Life is so amazing that when I listen about MOKSHA, I feel I want to relive life and understand it more and more and become better person in every life than I was in previous one. And may be after I have fulfilled all my dreams may my soul rest in peace. Until then I wish to live life to have the truth in me, to have the best character, to learn each day new values and culture for my betterment as a person, to get love as much as I can and to give love more than I get, to live life in such a way that my heart and soul live at peace from inside, not for money, not for luxury, not for hate, not for revenge, not for people, not for success, not for anything else but for my learning...
I bow to my life in contention and happiness, for beauty it has and for it's love and blessings.

Crossword! :-*

In the mall, while roaming around suddenly I saw THE CROSSWORD! :O
I was attracted to it automatically like an iron to magnet. I went inside and soon went CRAZY! Oh My God, so many books and that too ORIGINAL. There were many my favourite books which I've already read in the past, then there were few which I wish to read and also found one that I'm currently reading. Looking at those books it made me feel what true reading is I've never actually experienced. True reading would be reading these books. I spent few hours there, looking with amusement at all sections. Also selected few books which I would buy sooner than anything else for myself I'll purchase.
Wow! My brothers literally pulled me out of the store, like you drag a child out from toys store. I really didn't felt like coming out...
Even while writing about it I can feel the pleasure that one can have while reading those amazing books. Neat, new, tidy, original, superb. Even with it's touch you fall in love with the book!

Wow....
I'm loving it! :-*

I wish to read almost all good books ever written in this world.
:-D

Na Ghar ke na Ghaat ke

In fulfilling others expectations and desires you forget your own expectations with you, your own desires and yet no one seems satisfied with you!
It feels you should not care about others expectations with you at least you'll be happy satisfying yourself.
Nahi toh na Ghar ke aur na Ghaat ke! :-D

Thank you

I'm grateful for my life for I'm born normal, because I got lovely family who loves me, cares for me, who had nurtured me and so much they've done for me, it's priceless and unexplained in words.
I'm thankful for all people that I've ever met, known, talked to because of them I've always learnt so much that I would not have learnt otherwise in books, about this life.

But I'm very very thankful for having the education that I got. I'm more mature, intelligent and could earn my living coz of it. I'm happy to have got superb teachers who not only taught me about books but about life too. They're all great people and I'm very grateful to have learnt from them all.

I'm much much thankful to have got such superb friends. They're not only intelligent but are superb persons too. Humble, understanding, mature, helpful, loving, caring and most supportive. I've learnt so much from each of my friends too. I'm lucky to have all of them in my life. They've inspired me when I needed, they supported me when I was broken, they helped me to forget all negative thoughts and helped me in having a positive look out for life. Without them, I would not have been what I'm. All my friends play very important role in my life and I'm blessed to have them in my life. May we remain friends forever. Though I know itna jaldi picha chodne wale nahi hai unlog! :-P ;-)

I'm most grateful to have been able to READ coz of which my life could take new shapes and become better. All those superb writers whose books I've read, their writing has not only inspired me but have many times given me new life, new means to live. I'm truly grateful to them all. Hoping to read more great works by great people.

Last but not least, to all those who have given me respect, who give me values, who consider me as their asset, who believe in me, who have faith in me, who trust me, who LOVE me truly, who have given me all their love and affection, may be in any form or expressed in any way. I'm very very thankful to all those lovely people.

Thank you GOD, for giving me this life!
I'm short of words to thank you God and I got no reason to tell you why I'm so grateful to you, you know it all, they say. So thank you for you know ALL! ;-)
:-)

May God keep their blessings on me and all of us, forever.

Humdard

Crazy for this song...

Pal, do pal, ki hi kyun hai zindagi
Iss, pyar, ko hai sadiyaan kaafi nahi
Toh khuda se maang lun
Mohalat main ek nayi
Rehna hai bas yahaan
Ab door tujhse jaana nahi

Jo tu mera humdard hai
Jo tu mera humdard hai
Suhaana har dard hai
Jo tu mera humdard hai

Teri muskurahatein hain taaqat meri
Mujhko inhi se ummeed mili
Chaahe kare koi sitam ye jahaan
Inme hi hai sadaa hifaazat meri

Zindagani badi khoobsurat hui
Jannat ab aur kya hogi kahin
Jo tu mera Humdard hai
Jo tu mera Humdard hai
Suhaana har dard hai
Jo tu mera Humdard hai

Teri dhadkano se hai zindagi meri
Khwahishein teri ab duaaein meri
Kitna anokha bandhan hai ye
Teri meri jaan jo ek hui

Lotunga yahaan tere paas main haan
Waada hai mera mar bhi jaaun kahin

Jo tu mera humdard hai
Jo tu mera humdard hai
Suhaana har dard hai
Jo tu mera humdard hai

What lyrics, dil ko chu liya... :-*
Sone pe suhaga is, it's sung by Arijit!

Tillu

Waiting outside the Operation Theater, we were praying God for safe and healthy baby. Whatever it may be but may it be with normal health was our wishes.
On 11th June, 2014 at 7.54am there came new member in my family. Timid, tiny, Tillu... Weight mere 2kgs but gave us happiness of tons! :-D
Almost everyone of us had tears in our eyes... :’-) tears of happiness, joy, contentment, fulfillment of dreams.
That was the day I learnt what happiness of a child mean. Though I've become bua (aunt) but I felt no less than being mother.
After showing us once, nurse took baby back for check ups. After long wait of 1hr or so we could see him back. Nurse handed me the baby and I could see small face with button sized closed eyes, small more, pink lips, still chubby cheeks suitable to his face, rest body wrapped in cloth.
The feeling of holding him in hands couldn't be explained in words.
He is most tiny baby in the hospital and hence all nurses gave him name as Tillu! :-D
We are yet trying to come out of our happiness to think about naming him. :-)
One thing is sure, GOD is great to have created this universe and these day to day life is also only possible coz we could born like this.
Being parent is the greatest happiness for any person.
Looking forward to many amazing incidents that I would experience with my baby, my Tillu! :-*
He is apple of my eye, our eye...
Learning yet new form of LOVE, love for a child! :-*

First first...

This is something unique and new... There is always first, as they say... This is for first time for me too!
Actually, I never celebrated my birthday publicly, it never came during school days or college days (though there are possibilities that I didn't went to college, even if it would have come! :-P), nor when I was at office (was on audits most of the time...) and rarest rarely it once happened that it was on day I had lecture at class, back in 2009 I guess! I was literally not interested in going to class. I felt shy! Yeah, I can too be shy sometimes! ;-) :-P but I went and felt very embarrassing too when people wished me, though I wished no one would have!
I can only accept my family and friends to wish me, coz I feel that it matters to them at some level that I'm in their life. Rest, other world, just coz they come to know about it and wish me, I don't find any sense!?
May be because of this pattern, I never liked accepting the fact that today of my birthday. I never go and tell anyone that, "Hey, you know what!? TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY!" I never did that. In fact round about I feel no one should know it's my birthday. I know it's damn strange but I feel awkward, I don't know what to say or how to react when someone whom I don't expect to wish me, wishes me?!
I mean it's good that it's my birthday but what is so much special in it, I feel. I just want this day to be normal, like any other day. I just want to be with family and close friends. Before I didn't had this much acceptance too but now over the years I've learnt to accept it that it cannot be completely normal day. My Mom asks me what special I want to eat and they make me that, I brothers plan something surprising, my friends too come to my place and unexpectedly looking them I feel good. This much of celebration is quite enough for me. Before I even felt shy to cut cake, now I do it normally...
My Family wishes me sharp at 12am, if by any chance I'm asleep I'm woken up and wished. My best friends too call on 12, all are KUMBHAKARAN's still wake up till 12am and take efforts (or purposely to trouble me! :-P) call me or text me. My cousins also call at 12am. God! Next day I even forget whether the B'day is over yesterday night itself or still remaining! Ha ha ha... :-D
Before I had hidden my birthday date from social networking sites too. But now I keep it visible (don't faint, it's true! :-P) I also reply thanks to all those who wish me. Now I have gathered this much of acceptance...
But this year it's most unique than any other year it could be. My birthday on the EXAM day! Wow I'm so damn EXCITED! :-\ LOL... I have EXAM on the very day! Wow...

I want to switch off my mobile phone. But that would be so RUDE of ME! :O :-\ I know... I know... But I don't know what to do... Obviously no time to feel any special about this day, as I like.
But then others do feel it to be special and I respect that they love me for whatever and whoever I'm!
Just want to thank all those people who take efforts and remember me and my existence in this world!
I wish over the years I too accept it as a special day and learn to react normally how other people do.

PS: Best part is I'm not at office. They cut cake and ask to distribute chocolates to each and every colleague. This is beyond my imagination. I would have bunk office had I had it on the day, I'm sure! :-P
It is so embarrassing... :-D I never did that ever in my life (till now) ;-)
I'm MAD! I know...

One thing I do normally is I  accept GIFTS from anyone happily, for IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! :-)

Broken trust

I don't know why this life is testing me beyond my tolerance level?
Coming across few truths is sometimes so worst that you realise it was better when you were unknown to them. Coz after knowing about it, each breath seems unbearable. There seems no solution to it. Over and above you can't share it with anyone is the worst feeling. Keeping things locked in your heart forever and continuing to bear it is like dying each moment silently.
When time is crucial and important, why unusual things come in existence to occupy all mind space and leave vacuum in the heart forever!?

Life would be easy alone than to have fake people in it...

Selfish PEOPLE-Selfish WORLD

When outsiders behave with you practically, never showing any concern or care about what may happen to you, you still can accept their this strange behavior and live with it!
But...
When your own people, whom you know since birth, for whom you've sacrificed and who has sacrificed for you, when all of sudden they show carefree attitude, it hurts beyond any console! :’(
And you can tell no one about this feeling...

May be it's better to learn to not expect anything from anyone in this WORLD, where everyone is SELFISH by some or other means! :-\

How sick of ME! :-\

Today is my best friends birthday and I called her now instead of calling her yesterday night at 12 like we do!
I don't know how I got confused and thought it to be on Monday, 5th where it's on 3rd of May!
But she is my sweetheart of all times. The way she is, I just hope she remain so forever...
I've learnt so much from her and the learning still continues. She is girl with NO ego at all. She never argues, never complains, never demands...
She is best though I feel I don't deserve her but may be God is great to have given me a friend like her. May be to show me how good heart always wins over everything. She is one of the best human beings I've ever met.

Today I just wish from God that may all her remaining life she be just like this, the way she is since years! May she get good health, wealth, prosperity and success. May all her dreams come true. And all the pains she had gone through, may they never return back to her. May she be blessed with all the happiness that she deserve!

Many many happy returns of the day my Savi! :-*
May we remain friends forever and ever and ever...